Stealth Walking

The first half of today’s walk was pretty uneventful.  I think the only person I encountered was a woman with a leash-less dog behaving in a way our dog was far from able.  The second half was more eventful.  Although my fellow pedestirans were not friendly or making eye contact, they all seemed to be bunching up near the park.  The park also a few tennis balls flying around in the designated areas, and the grass clippings were doing their best to launch well beyond the angry riding mower.

As I rounded the softball fields, I saw a couple of ladies leisurely striding along the path I was preparing to conquer.  Conquer?  Yes, definitely so.  My pace increased as I anticipated how I would revel in the moment as I passed them and their puny legs.  As I continued to gain on them, I mulled over the Tarzan yell I might give or the hand stand I might do.  With a right hand turn just made, the time for the deed had arrived.  With no apparent idea I was rapidly eating their dust, they took their half of the sidewalk out of the middle.  When I uttered, “On your left.” the shorter of the two ladies nearly jumped out of her Valentines sweat shirt as she pulled the mace from her purse.

“I was ready to attack you.  I had no idea you were back there.”, she said.

“No problem.  I was ready for you.”, I replied.

“Give me more warning next time.  I will show what a granny can do.”

“I am sure you would.  I will wear my tap shoes next time.”

As I continued past them, I heard them both comment how neither of them had any idea I was coming up behind them.  I do not believe either of them mentioned, “Walking with a shotgun next time”, but this is Texas.

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