Package Pranks

As I pondering writing this post, I was not sure how to title it OR what stories could be cobbled together to make it work.  While they may not all be pranks, it may be better stated as being outside of the norm OR, in one case, the new norm.

Magazine defiling:  When I was growing up a few to many decades ago, I used to subscribe to a magazine that attempted to appeal to my teenage mind.  This magazine had comic strips, posters, and other things targeting my pubescent mind.  As my hand reached into my mailbox on that ancient day, I was excited to pull out a new edition of my magazine.  At the mailbox, I glanced over the magazine.  A couple of the pages seemed anxious to show me their offerings.  Unfortunately, the comics on the back were what my eyes lingered on.

I forget the exact setup of the comic strip.  I believe it has two brothers interacting.  In this particular one, the younger brother was getting the best of his older brother.  (In real life, I have a younger brother.)  Amazingly, written under the younger brother in the comic strip was my brother’s name, and under the older brother, my name was written.  It was handwritten.  I was bewildered how this might have occurred.

Fortunately, the post office employee who attended our church was so proud of himself he could not keep his mouth shut.  He admitted to seeing the magazine come through the post office.  Apparently, he could not control his mischievous side.  I don’t recall whether his desire to be ornery existed when the magazine was picked up OR if the cartoon made his Mr. Hyde emerge.  Regardless, he was quite proud of his prank.  If only “going postal” was as innocent as his little prank.

Package Delivery:  My son works at a popular fast food restaurant.  It is literally only a 15 minute walk from the house.  It appears this place is quite popular with the local delivery people as well.  As a package needed to be signed for the other day, I was working on scribbling out the scratches that constitute my signature.  The delivery guy then comments, “Your son told me he would not be home tonight.”  I must have given him quite an odd look because he felt compelled to explain. (My son backed up his claims as well.)

“I talk to your son almost every day.  When I was going through the drive thru today, I told your son I had a package for you.  Your son told me to tease you a little bit.  So, that is what I tried to do.”, he said.

My son got a kick out of it when next I talked to him.  While he and my relationship is not always perfect, it is a relief to know he puts into practice nearly everything Dale Carnegie taught in his book.

Amazon Delivery:  As I sat in my den with a window facing toward the front of the house, I was surprised to hear a car stop in front of our mailbox.  As a reluctantly unrepentant nosey person, I observed what was occurring.  A very casually dressed female emerged from the car and opened the trunk.  She grabbed a package from the trunk before setting back in her car.  She did something to the package before walking up the sidewalk and doing the knock/doorbell combo. I opened the door to find my package.  It was in one of those really flexible mail bags.

These particular items were ordered two days ago–I believe they were only stocked in Kentucky.  Previously, I ordered a computer cable in the morning, and it was delivered in the afternoon.  Having received items from Amazon from non-UPS or USPS sources, I became curious how they are doing this.  And, a little browsing did make it clear.  They have started an “Uber” for package delivery.  They call it Amazon Flex.    Here are what you can expect and need to work for them:

Why Amazon Flex?
– Flexible hours — Schedule ahead or pick up any available delivery block of time
– Great pay — Make $18/hr
– Available work — Delivery opportunities available 7 days a week

To get started you must be:
– 21 years old
– Have a car and a valid driver’s license
– Have an Android phone

I don’t see myself applying for this or any similar job soon.  (My phone is not an Android.)  But, it does give options to a variety of people who might not otherwise generate a reliable income.  Having watched both of the Amazon Flex deliveries come to my house,  I can safely say the individuals did not look like they gave up their business casual jobs just the other day.  Their dress indicated they had been building their casual wardrobe for possibly a number of years.

**********

Okay, I admit the three stories got worse as you read through them.  I probably could have organized them better or thrown in a couple of completely fictitious stories.  This blog has not graduated to heavy fiction yet.  With strong encouragement, dementia, or some other activity that either degrades mental capacity OR releases ideas that have been sent via extra-dimensional brain transfer, I hope to achieve a level of reading pleasure far exceeding what is presently produced by my unpredictable finger spasms.  If this goal goes unrealized, it is better to set a goal and fail to meet it then to never set a goal at all, right?

 

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